2 - Tradition and Its Demise: Gender and Class in Wengeroff

Summary

[The otkupshchiki] go to taverns, drink tea, and woe to their wives.

WENGEROFF makes a central claim in Volume II of Memoirs. In a pivotal chapter entitled ‘My Wise Mother Said Two Things’, she asserts that to the reasonable, balanced desire of Jewish mothers to impart to their children ‘the ethics of Judaism, the traditions of its faith, the solemnity of the Sabbath and festivals, Hebrew, the teachings of the Bible … in beautiful and exalted forms—together with the fruits of the Enlightenment, together with the new that west European culture had produced’— to this moderate ‘plea and protest’, Jewish husbands always gave the same answer: ‘The children need no religion!’

She continues:

The young Jewish men of that time knew nothing of moderation and wanted to know nothing of it. In their inexperience, they wanted to make the dangerous leap instantly from the lowest rung of culture straight to the highest. Many demanded of their wives not just assent but submission, demanding of them abolition of all that was holy but yesterday. Preaching in society all the modern ideas, like freedom, equality, and brotherhood, these young men were at home the greatest despots to their wives, ruthlessly demanding the fulfillment of their wishes. There were bitter conflicts within the family life that until now had flowed in so patriarchal and contemplative a way. Many, many women did not wish to give in. They let their husbands have full freedom outside the house, asking, however, that in their own homes, the old, beloved customs be respected. That this double life was not tenable in the long run is obvious. The spirit of the age triumphed in this contest, and the weaker yielded, with bleeding hearts. This is what happened to others and to me.

Wengeroff asserts a stark, globalized claim of gender disparity about tradition and its loss among modernizing Russian Jews. She does not say ‘some men/husbands’, ‘some women/wives’, but generalizes sweepingly. Thus, as we have seen, she says about Kovno, ‘the men no longer kept the Sabbath holy; it did not interrupt the zeal for business … The women, whose very nature clung tenaciously to the ancient ways, would still take care to kindle the Sabbath lights … But her enlightened lord-husband lit a cigarette with them.’