Chapter 6 - Balancing Solitude with Social Time

Summary

A theme that comes up time and again in our research is the importance of balance. Being with people 24/7/365 doesn’t benefit anyone, not the person doing it nor the people they’re hanging out with. If we’re constantly marinating in others’ thoughts and opinions, we can lose track of our own. By the same token, being on our own day-in-and-day-out isn’t good either. The trick is to have equilibrium between the two, the right amount of social time to fulfill an evolutionary imperative and the ideal amount of solitude to reap its reward. Ultimately, the needs for both belonging and separation are not opposing drives so, how can we achieve psychological integration? This chapter elaborates on how to do that and on the true cause of loneliness.