Skip to main content Accessibility help

We use cookies to distinguish you from other users and to provide you with a better experience on our websites. Close this message to accept cookies or find out how to manage your cookie settings.

Close cookie message
×
Hostname: page-component-586b7cd67f-g8jcs Total loading time: 0 Render date: 2024-11-23T19:45:07.219Z Has data issue: false hasContentIssue false

19 - Men’s Attachment-Related Needs in the Sexual Arena

from Part III - Postcopulatory Adaptations

Published online by Cambridge University Press:  30 June 2022

By
Moran Mizrahi
Edited by
Todd K. Shackelford
Todd K. Shackelford
Affiliation:
Oakland University, Michigan
Get access

Summary

The attachment and sexual-mating behavioral systems operate jointly within romantic relationships and their reciprocal influences shape relationship quality and longevity. In line with evolutionary models and social perspectives, substantial evidence indicates that men and women differ in the sex-attachment linkage, such that men are more permissive in their sexual attitudes, adopt a more individualistic and pleasure-centered orientation toward sexuality, and are less likely to connect sexual encounters with emotional bonding relative to women. Men's higher sexual urges may also be related to common beliefs which assume that they are constantly interested in having sex, regardless of contextual cues. However, in the context of ongoing relationships, men's sexual motivations may be attuned to relationship goals and shaped by contextual factors such as their partner's responsiveness, attachment-related insecurities, and relationship duration. In this chapter, I present a more complex and nuanced picture of the sex-attachment linkage in men and discuss the multifaceted nature of their sexual desire within the relationship context. I review findings that demonstrate the role of men's sexual desire in the formation and maintenance of intimate relationships and challenge the common notion of the disconnect between men's sexual motivations and attachment needs. I also discuss the ways in which women's perceived responsiveness may shape men's sexual desire and felt security, especially among insecurely attached men. Furthermore, I review findings on the effect of women's displays of desire on men's attachment-related worries and dilemmas. Finally, I present findings on changes over relationship duration in men's sexual desire in committed, long-term relationships and discuss the importance of considering men's age when examining longitudinal effects of their desire and the extent to which men endorse emotional connection in sexual interactions. I conclude by discussing how men may satisfy relationship-related needs within the sexual arena in different relationship stages.

Keywords

attachmentcommitmentgender differencesrelationship developmentresponsivenesssexual desire
Type
Chapter
Information
The Cambridge Handbook of Evolutionary Perspectives on Sexual Psychology , pp. 451 - 475
Publisher: Cambridge University Press
Print publication year: 2022

Access options

Get access to the full version of this content by using one of the access options below. (Log in options will check for institutional or personal access. Content may require purchase if you do not have access.)

References

Abbey, A. (1982). Sex differences in attributions for friendly behavior: Do males misperceive females’ friendliness? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 42(5), 830–838.Google Scholar
Acevedo, B. P., & Aron, A. P. (2014). Romantic love, pair-bonding, and the dopaminergic reward system. In Mikulincer, M. & Shaver, P. R. (Eds.), Mechanisms of social connection: From brain to group (pp. 55–70). Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Alexander, M. G. & Fisher, T. D. (2003). Truth and consequences: Using the bogus pipeline to examine sex differences in self‐reported sexuality. Journal of Sex Research, 40(1), 27–35.Google Scholar
Allen, E. S., & Baucom, D. H. (2004). Adult attachment and patterns of extradyadic involvement. Family Process, 43(4), 467–488.Google Scholar
Balzarini, R. N., Muise, A., Dobson, K., Kohut, T., Raposo, S., & Campbell, L. (2021). The detriments of unmet sexual ideals and buffering effect of sexual responsiveness. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. Advance online publication. doi: 10.1037/pspi0000323Google Scholar
Basson, R. (2001). Using a different model for female sexual response to address women’s problematic low sexual desire. Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, 27(5), 395–403.Google Scholar
Baumeister, R. F. (2000). Gender differences in erotic plasticity: The female sex drive as socially flexible and responsive. Psychological Bulletin, 126(3), 347–374.Google Scholar
Baumeister, R. F., & Bratslavsky, E. (1999). Passion, intimacy, and time: Passionate love as a function of change in intimacy. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 3(1), 49–67.Google Scholar
Baumeister, R. F., Catanese, K. R., & Vohs, K. D. (2001). Is there a gender difference in strength of sex drive? Theoretical views, conceptual distinctions, and a review of relevant evidence. Personality and Social Psychological Review, 5(3), 242–273.Google Scholar
Beck, J. G., Bozman, A. W., & Qualtrough, T. (1991). The experience of sexual desire: Psychological correlates in a college sample. Journal of Sex Research, 28(3), 443–456.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Belsky, J., Steinberg, L., & Draper, P. (1991). Childhood experience, interpersonal development, and reproductive strategy: An evolutionary theory of socialization. Child Development, 62(4), 647–670.Google Scholar
Berscheid, E. (1988). Some comments on love’s anatomy: Or, whatever happened to old-fashioned lust? In Sternberg, R. J. & Barnes, M. L. (Eds.), The psychology of love (pp. 359–374). New Haven, CT: Yale University Press.Google Scholar
Berscheid, E., & Reis, H. T. (1998). Attraction and close relationships. In Gilbert, D. T., Fiske, S. T., & Lindzey, G. (Eds.), The handbook of social psychology (3rd ed., Vol. 2, pp. 193–281). New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E. (2007). Beyond the borders of reality: Attachment orientations and sexual fantasies. Personal Relationships, 14(2), 321–342.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E. (2016). Attachment and sexual mating: The joint operation of separate motivational systems. In Cassidy, J., & Shaver, P. R. (Eds.), Handbook of attachment, third edition: Theory, research, and clinical applications (pp. 464–483). New York, NY: Guilford Press.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E. (2018). The fragile spell of desire: A functional perspective on changes in sexual desire across relationship development. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 22(2), 101–127.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E., Ein-Dor, T., Reis, H. T., & Segal, N. (2014). Why do men prefer nice women? Gender typicality mediates the effect of responsiveness on perceived attractiveness in initial acquaintanceships. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 40(10), 1341–1353.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E., & Finkel, E. J. (2015). The magnetism that holds us together: Sexuality and relationship maintenance across relationship development. Current Opinion in Psychology, 1, 29–33.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E., & Gillath, O. (2006). Measuring subgoals of the sexual behavioral system: What is sex good for? Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 23(5), 675–701.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G., Hirschberger, G., & Goldenberg, J. (2011). Desire in the face of death: Terror management, attachment, and sexual motivation. Personal Relationships, 18(1), 1–19.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E., & Laser-Brandt, D. (2002). Gender differences in the experience of heterosexual intercourse. The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 11(3–4), 143–158.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E., & Reis, H. T. (2006). Women’s sexual working models: An evolutionary-attachment perspective. Journal of Sex Research, 43(4), 328–342.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E., & Reis, H. T. (2012). When does responsiveness pique sexual interest? Attachment and sexual desire in initial acquaintanceships. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 38(7), 946–958.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Birnbaum, G. E., Reis, H. T., Mikulincer, M., Gillath, O., & Orpaz, A. (2006). When sex is more than just sex: Attachment orientations, sexual experience, and relationship quality. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 91(5), 929–943.Google Scholar
Birnbaum, G. E., Reis, H. T., Mizrahi, M., Kanat-Maymon, Y., Sass, O., & Granovski-Milner, C. (2016). Intimately connected: The importance of partner responsiveness for experiencing sexual desire. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 111(4), 530–546.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Birnbaum, G. E., Weisberg, Y. J., & Simpson, J. A. (2011). Desire under attack: Attachment orientations and the effects of relationship threat on sexual motivations. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 28(4), 448–468.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Blumstein, P., & Schwartz, P. (1983). American couples. New York, NY: Simon & Schuster.Google Scholar
Bogaert, A. F., & Brotto, L. A. (2014). Object of desire self-consciousness theory. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 40(4), 323–338.Google Scholar
Bogaert, A. F., & Sadava, S. (2002). Adult attachment and sexual behavior. Personal Relationships, 9(2), 191–204.Google Scholar
Bogaert, A. F., Visser, B. A., & Pozzebon, J. A. (2015). Gender differences in object of desire self-consciousness sexual fantasies. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 44(8), 2299–2310.Google Scholar
Bowlby, J. (1982/1969). Attachment and loss: Vol. 1. Attachment (2nd ed.). New York, NY: Basic Books.Google Scholar
Brassard, A., Shaver, P. R., & Lussier, Y. (2007). Attachment, sexual experience, and sexual pressure in romantic relationships: A dyadic approach. Personal Relationships, 14(3), 475–494.Google Scholar
Brotto, L. (2010). The DSM diagnostic criteria for hypoactive sexual desire disorder in men. Journal of Sexual Medicine, 7(6), 2015–2030.Google Scholar
Buss, D. M., & Kenrick, D. T. (1998). Evolutionary social psychology. In Gilbert, D. T., Fiske, S. T., & Lindzey, G. (Eds.), The handbook of social psychology (3rd ed., Vol. 2, pp. 982–1026). New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.Google Scholar
Buss, D. M., & Schmitt, D. P. (1993). Sexual strategies theory: An evolutionary perspective on human mating. Psychological Review, 100(2), 204–232.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Byers, E. S., & Heinlein, L. (1989). Predicting initiations and refusals of sexual activities in married and cohabiting heterosexual couples. Journal of Sex Research, 26(2), 210–231.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Carothers, B. J., & Reis, H. T. (2013). Men and women are from Earth: Examining the latent structure of gender. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 104(2), 385–407.Google Scholar
Carter, C. S., Ahnert, L., Grossmann, K. E., Hrdy, S. B., Lamb, M. E., Porges, S. W., & Sachser, N. (2005). Attachment and bonding: A new synthesis. Cambridge, MA: MIT Press.Google Scholar
Cassidy, J. (1999). The nature of the child’s ties. In Cassidy, J., & Shaver, P. R. (Eds.), Handbook of attachment: Theory, research, and clinical applications (pp. 3–20). New York, NY: Guilford Press.Google Scholar
Chivers, M. L., Rieger, G., Latty, E., & Bailey, J. M. (2004). A sex difference in the specificity of sexual arousal. Psychological Science, 15(11), 736–44.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Clark, R. D. (1990). The impact of AIDS on gender differences in willingness to engage in casual sex. Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 20, 771–782.Google Scholar
Clark, R. D., & Hatfield, E. (1989). Gender differences in receptivity to sexual offers. Journal of Psychology & Human Sexuality, 2(1), 39–55.Google Scholar
Cooper, M. L., Pioli, M., Levitt, A., Talley, A., Micheas, L., & Collins, N. L. (2006). Attachment styles, sex motives, and sexual behavior: Evidence for gender specific expressions of attachment dynamics. In Mikulincer, M. & Goodman, G. S. (Eds.), Dynamics of love: Attachment, caregiving, and sex (pp. 243–274). New York, NY: Guilford Press.Google Scholar
Conley, T. D. (2011). Perceived proposer personality characteristics and gender differences in acceptance of casual sex offers. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 100(2), 309–329.Google Scholar
Davies, S., Katz, J., & Jackson, J. L. (1999). Sexual desire discrepancies: Effects on sexual and relationship satisfaction in heterosexual dating couples. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 28(6), 553–567.Google Scholar
Davis, D. (2006). Attachment-related pathways to sexual coercion. In Mikulincer, M. & Goodman, G. (Eds.), Dynamics of romantic love (pp. 293–336). New York, NY: Guilford Press.Google Scholar
Day, L. C., Muise, A., Joel, S., & Impett, E. A. (2015). To do it or not to do it? How communally motivated people navigate sexual interdependence dilemmas. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 41(6), 791–804.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Del Giudice, M. (2009). Sex, attachment, and the development of reproductive strategies. Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 32(1), 1–67.Google Scholar
Denes, A., Dhillon, A., & Speer, A. C. (2017). Relational maintenance strategies during the post sex time interval. Communication Quarterly, 65(3), 307–332.Google Scholar
Denney, N. W., Field, J. K., & Quadagno, D. (1984). Sex differences in sexual needs and desires. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 13(3), 233–245.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Diamond, L. M. (2003). What does sexual orientation orient? A biobehavioral model distinguishing romantic love and sexual desire. Psychological Review, 110(1), 173–192.Google Scholar
Diamond, L. M. (2004). Emerging perspectives on distinctions between romantic love and sexual desire. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 13(3), 116–119.Google Scholar
Ditzen, B., Schaer, M., Gabriel, B., Bodenmann, G., Ehlert, U., & Heinrichs, M. (2009). Intranasal oxytocin increases positive communication and reduces cortisol levels during couple conflict. Biological Psychiatry, 65(9), 728–731.Google Scholar
Eastwick, P. W. (2009). Beyond the Pleistocene: Using phylogeny and constraint to inform the evolutionary psychology of human mating. Psychological Bulletin, 135(5), 794–821.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Eastwick, P. W., & Finkel, E. J. (2008). The attachment system in fledgling relationships: An activating role for attachment anxiety. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95(3), 628–647.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Eastwick, P. W., Keneski, E., Morgan, T. A., McDonald, M. A., & Huang, S. A. (2018). What do short-term and long-term relationships look like? Building the relationship coordination and strategic timing (ReCAST) model. Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, 147(5), 747–781.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Ellis, B. J., & Symons, D. (1990). Sex differences in sexual fantasy: An evolutionary psychological approach. Journal of Sex Research, 27(4), 527–555.Google Scholar
Fisher, H. E. (1998). Lust, attraction, and attachment in mammalian reproduction. Human Nature, 9(1), 23–52.Google Scholar
Fletcher, G. J. O., Simpson, J. A., Campbell, L., & Overall, N. C. (2015). Pair-bonding, romantic love, and evolution: The curious case of Homo sapiens. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 10(1), 20–36.Google Scholar
Ford, C. S., & Beach, F. A. (1951). Patterns of sexual behavior. New York, NY: Harper & Row.Google Scholar
Gagnon, J. H., & Simon, W. (1973). Sexual conduct: The social sources of human sexuality. Chicago, IL: Aldine.Google Scholar
Garcia, J. R., Gesselman, A. N., Massey, S. G., Seibold-Simpson, S., & Merriwether, A. M. (2018). Intimacy through casual sex: Relational context of sexual activity and affectionate behaviors. Journal of Relationships Research, 9, E12. doi: 10.1017/jrr.2018.10Google Scholar
Gentzler, A. L., & Kerns, K. A. (2004). Associations between insecure attachment and sexual experiences. Personal Relationships, 11(2), 249–265.Google Scholar
Haselton, M. G., & Buss, D. M. (2000). Error management theory: A new perspective on biases in cross-sex mind reading. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 78(1), 81–91.Google Scholar
Hatfield, E., & Sprecher, S. (1986). Measuring passionate love in intimate relationships. Journal of Adolescence, 9(4), 383–410.Google Scholar
Hazan, C., & Zeifman, D. (1994). Sex and psychological tether. In Bartholomew, K & Perlman, D (Eds.), Advances in personal relationships: Vol. 5. Attachment processes in adulthood (pp. 151–177). Philadelphia, PA: Jessica Kingsley.Google Scholar
Hite, S. (1976). The Hite report: A nationwide study of female sexuality. New York, NY: Macmillan.Google Scholar
Hite, S. (1978). The Hite report on male sexuality. New York, NY: Knopf.Google Scholar
Hughes, S. M., & Kruger, D. J. (2011). Sex differences in post-coital behaviors in long- and short-term mating: An evolutionary perspective. Journal of Sex Research, 48(5), 496–505.Google Scholar
Hyde, J. S., & Oliver, M. B. (2000). Gender differences in sexuality: Results from meta-analysis. In Travis, C. B & White, J. W (Eds.), Psychology of women: 4. Sexuality, society, and feminism (pp. 57–77). Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.Google Scholar
Kiefer, A. K., & Sanchez, D. T. (2007). Scripting sexual passivity: A gender role perspective. Personal Relationships, 14(2), 269–290.Google Scholar
Kim, J. J., Muise, A., Sakaluk, J. K., Rosen, N. O., & Impett, E. A. (2020). When tonight is not the night: Sexual rejection behaviors and satisfaction in romantic relationships. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 46(10), 1476–1490.Google Scholar
Klusmann, D. (2002). Sexual motivation and the duration of partnership. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 31(3), 275–287.Google Scholar
Knoth, R., Boyd, K., & Singer, B. (1988). Empirical tests of sexual selection theory: Predictions of sex differences in onset, intensity, and time course of sexual arousal. Journal of Sex Research, 24, 73–89.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Kruger, D. J., & Hughes, S. (2010). Variation in reproductive strategies influences post-coital experiences with partners. Journal of Social, Evolutionary, and Cultural Psychology, 4(4), 254–264.Google Scholar
Landau, M. J., Goldenberg, J. L., Greenberg, J., Gillath, O., Solomon, S., Cox, C., & Pyszczynski, T. (2006). The siren’s call: Terror management and the threat of men’s sexual attraction to women. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 90(1), 129–146.Google Scholar
van Lankveld, J., Jacobs, N., Thewissen, V., Dewitte, M., & Verboon, P. (2018). The associations of intimacy and sexuality in daily life: Temporal dynamics and gender effects within romantic relationships. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 35(4), 557–576.Google Scholar
Laumann, E. O., Gagnon, J. H., Michael, R. T., & Michaels, S. (1994). The social organization of sexuality: Sexual practices in the United States. Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press.Google Scholar
Leitenberg, H., & Henning, K. (1995). Sexual fantasy. Psychological Bulletin, 117(3), 469–496.Google Scholar
Lemay, E. P., & Wolf, N. R. (2016). Projection of romantic and sexual desire in opposite-sex friendships: How wishful thinking creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 42(7), 864–878.Google Scholar
Mark, K. P. (2012). The relative impact of individual sexual desire and couple desire discrepancy on satisfaction in heterosexual couples. Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 27(2), 133–146.Google Scholar
Mark, K. P. (2014). The impact of daily sexual desire and daily sexual desire discrepancy on the quality of the sexual experience in couples. Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 23(1), 27–33.Google Scholar
Mark, K. P., & Murray, S. H. (2012). Gender differences in desire discrepancy as a predictor of sexual and relationship satisfaction in a college sample of heterosexual romantic relationships. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 38(2), 198–215.Google Scholar
Masters, T. N., Casey, E., Wells, E. A., & Morrison, D. M. (2013). Sexual scripts among young heterosexually active men and women: Continuity and change. Journal of Sex Research, 50(5), 409–420.Google Scholar
McCabe, M. P. (1987). Desired and experienced levels of premarital affection and sexual intercourse during dating. Journal of Sex Research, 23(1), 23–33.Google Scholar
McNulty, J. K., Maxwell, J. A., Meltzer, A. L., & Baumeister, R. F. (2019). Sex-differentiated changes in sexual desire predict marital dissatisfaction. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 48(8), 2473–2489.Google Scholar
Meltzer, A. L., McNulty, J. K., & Maner, J. K. (2017). Women like being valued for sex, as long as it is by a committed partner. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 46(2), 475–488.Google Scholar
Ménard, A. D., Kleinplatz, P. J., Rosen, L., Lawless, S., Paradis, N., Campbell, M., & Huber, J. D. (2015). Individual and relational contributors to optimal sexual experiences in older men and women. Sexual and Relationships Therapy, 30(1), 78–93.Google Scholar
Meston, C. M., & Buss, D. M. (2007). Why humans have sex. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 36(4), 477–507.Google Scholar
Mikulincer, M., & Shaver, P. R. (2007). Attachment in adulthood: Structure, dynamics and change. New York, NY: Guilford Press.Google Scholar
Mikulincer, M., & Shaver, P. R. (2008). Adult attachment and affect regulation. In Cassidy, J. & Shaver, P. R. (Eds.), Handbook of attachment: Theory, research, and clinical applications (pp. 503–531). New York, NY: Guilford Press.Google Scholar
Mikulincer, M., & Shaver, P. R. (2012). Attachment theory expanded: A behavioral systems approach. In Deaux, K. & Snyder, M. (Eds.), Oxford handbook of personality and social psychology (pp. 467–492). New York, NY: Oxford University Press.Google Scholar
Milhausen, R. R., & Herold, E. S. (1999). Does the sexual double standard still exist? Perceptions of university women. Journal of Sex Research, 36(4), 361–368.Google Scholar
Miller, S. A., & Byers, E. S. (2004). Actual and desired duration of foreplay and intercourse: Discordance and misperceptions within heterosexual couples. Journal of Sex Research, 41(3), 301–309.Google Scholar
Mitchell, K. R., Wellings, K. A., & Graham, C. (2014). How do men and women define sexual desire and sexual arousal? Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 40(1), 17–32.Google Scholar
Mizrahi, M., Hirschberger, G., Mikulincer, M., Szepsenwol, O., & Birnbaum, G. E. (2016). Reassuring sex: Can sexual desire and intimacy reduce relationship‐specific attachment insecurities? European Journal of Social Psychology, 46(4), 467–480.Google Scholar
Mizrahi, M., Kanat-Maymon, Y., & Birnbaum, G. E. (2018). You haven’t been on my mind lately: Partner responsiveness mediates the link between attachment insecurity and sexual fantasies. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 35(4), 440–459.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Mizrahi, M., Reis, H. T., Maniaci, M. R., & Birnbaum, G. E. (2019). When insecurity dampens desire: Attachment anxiety in men amplifies the decline in sexual desire during the early years of romantic relationships. European Journal of Social Psychology, 49(6), 1223–1236.Google Scholar
Muise, A., Giang, E., & Impett, E. A. (2014). Post sex affectionate exchanges promote sexual and relationship satisfaction. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 43(7), 1391–1402.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Muise, A., & Impett, E. A. (2015). Good, giving, and game: The relationship benefits of communal sexual motivation. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 6(2), 164–172.Google Scholar
Muise, A., Impett, E. A., Kogan, A., & Desmarias, S. (2013). Keeping the spark alive: Being motivated to meet a partners’ sexual needs sustains sexual desire in long-term romantic relationships. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 4(3), 267–273.Google Scholar
Muise, A., Stanton, S. C. E., Kim, J. J., & Impett, E. A. (2016). Not in the mood? Men under- (not over-) perceive their partner’s sexual desire in established intimate relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 110(5), 725–742.Google Scholar
Murnen, S. K., & Stockton, M. (1997). Gender and self-reported sexual arousal in response to sexual stimuli: A meta-analytic review. Sex Roles: A Journal of Research, 37(3–4), 135–153.Google Scholar
Murray, S. H. (2018). Heterosexual men’s sexual desire: Supported by, or deviating from, traditional masculinity norms and sexual scripts? Sex Roles: A Journal of Research, 78(1–2), 130–141.Google Scholar
Murray, S., & Milhausen, R. (2012). Factors impacting women’s sexual desire: Examining long-term relationships in emerging adulthood. Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 21(2), 101–115.Google Scholar
Murray, S. H., Milhausen, R. R., Graham, C., & Kuczynski, L. (2017). A qualitative exploration of factors that affect sexual desire among men aged 30 to 65 in long-term relationships. Journal of Sex Research, 54(3), 319–330.Google Scholar
Oliver, M. B., & Hyde, J. S. (1993). Gender differences in sexuality: A meta-analysis. Psychological Bulletin, 114(1), 29–51.Google Scholar
O’Sullivan, L., & Byers, E. S. (1992). College students’ incorporation of initiator and restrictor roles in sexual dating interactions. Journal of Sex Research, 29(3), 435–446.Google Scholar
Raposo, S., Impett, E. A., & Muise, A. (2020). Avoidantly attached individuals are more exchange-oriented and less communal in the bedroom. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 49(8), 2863–2881.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Reis, H. T. (2014). Responsiveness: Affective interdependence in close relationships. In Mikulincer, M. & Shaver, P. R. (Eds.), Mechanisms of social connection: From brain to group (pp. 255–271). Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.Google Scholar
Reis, H. T., & Clark, M. S. (2013). Responsiveness. In Simpson, J. A. & Campbell, L. (Eds.), The Oxford handbook of close relationships (pp. 400–423). Oxford University Press.Google Scholar
Reis, H. T., & Mizrahi, M. (2018). Whither relationship science? The state of the science and an agenda for moving forward. In Vangelisti, A. L. & Perlman, D. (Eds.), The Cambridge handbook of personal relationships (pp. 553–564). New York, NY: Cambridge University Press.Google Scholar
Righetti, F., Balliet, D., Molho, C., Columbus, S., Faure, R., Bahar, Y., … & Arriaga, X. (2020). Fostering attachment security: The role of interdependent situations. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 17(20), 7648. doi: 10.3390/ijerph17207648Google Scholar
Rosen, N. O., Bailey, K., & Muise, A. (2018). Degree and direction of sexual desire discrepancy are linked to sexual and relationship satisfaction in couples transitioning to parenthood. Journal of Sex Research, 55(2), 214–225.Google Scholar
Rosen, R. C., Heiman, J. R., Long, J. S., Fisher, W. A., & Sand, M. S. (2016). Men with sexual problems and their partners: Findings from the international survey of relationships. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 45(1), 159–173.Google Scholar
Rubin, H., & Campbell, L. (2012). Day-to-day changes in intimacy predict heightened relationship passion, sexual occurrence, and sexual satisfaction: A dyadic diary analysis. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 3(2), 224–231.Google Scholar
Sakaluk, J. K., & Milhausen, R. R. (2012) Factors influencing university students’ explicit and implicit sexual double standards. Journal of Sex Research, 49(5), 464–476.Google Scholar
Sanchez, D. T., Fetterolf, J. C., & Rudman, L. A. (2012). Eroticizing inequality in the United States: The consequences and determinants of traditional gender role adherence in intimate relationships. Journal of Sex Research, 49(2–3), 168–183.Google Scholar
Seal, D. W., & Ehrhardt, A. A. (2003). Masculinity and urban men: Perceived scripts for courtship, romantic, and sexual interactions with women. Culture, Health & Sexuality, 5, 295–319.Google Scholar
Shackelford, T. K., Goetz, A. T., LaMunyon, C. W., Quintus, B. J., & Weekes-Shackelford, V. A. (2004). Sex differences in sexual psychology produce sex-similar preferences for a short-term mate. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 33(4), 405–412.Google Scholar
Shaver, P., Hazan, C., & Bradshaw, D. (1988). Love as attachment. In Sternberg, R. J. & Barnes, M. L. (Eds.), The psychology of love (pp. 68–99). New Haven, CT: Yale University Press.Google Scholar
Simon, W., & Gagnon, J. H. (2003). Sexual scripts: Origins, influences and change. Qualitative Sociology, 26(4), 491–497.Google Scholar
Sprecher, S. (2013). Attachment style and sexual permissiveness: The moderating role of gender. Personality and Individual Differences, 55(4), 428–432.Google Scholar
Sprecher, S., Barbee, A., & Schwartz, P. (1995). “Was it good for you, too?”: Gender differences in first sexual experiences. Journal of Sex Research, 32(1), 3–15.Google Scholar
Sprecher, S., & Regan, P. C. (1998). Passionate and companionate love in courting and young married couples. Sociological Inquiry, 68(2), 163–185.Google Scholar
Sroufe, L. A., & Waters, E. (1977). Attachment as an organizational construct. Child Development, 48(4), 1184–1199.Google Scholar
Štulhofer, A., Carvalheira, A. A., & Træen, B. (2013). Is responsive sexual desire for partnered sex problematic among men? Insights from a two-country study. Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 28(3), 246–258.Google Scholar
Štulhofer, A., Jurin, T., Graham, C., Janssen, E., & Træen, B. (2020). Emotional intimacy and sexual well-being in aging European couples: A cross-cultural mediation analysis. European Journal of Ageing, 17, 43–54.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Szymanski, D. M., & Stewart-Richardson, D. N. (2014). Psychological, relational, and sexual correlates of pornography use on young adult heterosexual men in romantic relationships. Journal of Men’s Studies, 22(1), 64–82.Google Scholar
Trivers, R. L. (1996). Parental investment and sexual selection. In Houck, L. D & Drickamer, L. C (Eds.), Foundations of animal behavior: Classic papers with commentaries (pp. 795–838). Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press. Reprinted from Campbell, B. (Ed.), Sexual selection and the descent of man, 1871–1971, 1972, pp. 136–179. Chicago, IL: Aldine.Google Scholar
Vannier, S. A., & O’Sullivan, L. F. (2010). Sex without desire: Characteristics of occasions of sexual compliance in young adults’ committed relationships. Journal of Sex Research, 47(5), 429–439.Google Scholar
Vohs, K. D., Catanese, K. R., & Baumeister, R. F. (2004). Sex in “his” versus “her” relationships. In Harvey, J. H., Wenzel, A., & Sprecher, S. (Eds.), The handbook of sexuality in close relationships (pp. 455–474). Mahwah, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates.Google Scholar
Wiederman, M. W. (2005). The gendered nature of sexual scripts. The Family Journal, 13(4), 496–502.Google Scholar
Young, L. J., & Wang, Z. (2004). The neurobiology of pair-bonding. Nature Neuroscience, 7(10), 1048–1054.Google Scholar
Zeifman, D., & Hazan, C. (2008). Pair bonds as attachments: Reevaluating the evidence. In Cassidy, J. & Shaver, P. R. (Eds.), Handbook of attachment: Theory, research, and clinical applications (pp. 436–455). New York, NY: Guilford Press.Google Scholar

Save book to Kindle

To save this book to your Kindle, first ensure [email protected] is added to your Approved Personal Document E-mail List under your Personal Document Settings on the Manage Your Content and Devices page of your Amazon account. Then enter the ‘name’ part of your Kindle email address below. Find out more about saving to your Kindle.

Note you can select to save to either the @free.kindle.com or @kindle.com variations. ‘@free.kindle.com’ emails are free but can only be saved to your device when it is connected to wi-fi. ‘@kindle.com’ emails can be delivered even when you are not connected to wi-fi, but note that service fees apply.

Find out more about the Kindle Personal Document Service.

Available formats
×

Save book to Dropbox

To save content items to your account, please confirm that you agree to abide by our usage policies. If this is the first time you use this feature, you will be asked to authorise Cambridge Core to connect with your account. Find out more about saving content to Dropbox.

Available formats
×

Save book to Google Drive

To save content items to your account, please confirm that you agree to abide by our usage policies. If this is the first time you use this feature, you will be asked to authorise Cambridge Core to connect with your account. Find out more about saving content to Google Drive.

Available formats
×