This study explores the parable of the Rich Man and Lazarus, elucidating the details of Lazarus' worldly suffering – what it is that ails him, and whether the dogs are friends or fiends. Fresh evidence from the classical world is brought to bear, including medical texts, miracle stories and philosophical treatises, in addition to overlooked Jewish and Christian testimony. The results establish the plausibility of maladies unrelated to diseases or skin conditions, and reveal the dogs to be positive characters that highlight Lazarus' penury and the rich man's depravity. New avenues into several broader interpretive issues of the parable are explored.