Hostname: page-component-78c5997874-dh8gc Total loading time: 0 Render date: 2024-11-19T12:55:48.713Z Has data issue: false hasContentIssue false
  • English
  • Français

The Better Part of Valor: Developing a System for Studying How Couples Transition Out of Untimely Conflict Conversations

Published online by Cambridge University Press:  01 September 2015

Tatiana D. Gray ,
Matt Hawrilenko  and
James V. Cordova
Tatiana D. Gray*
Affiliation:
Clark University, Psychology Department, Worcester, Massachusetts, USA
Matt Hawrilenko
Affiliation:
Clark University, Psychology Department, Worcester, Massachusetts, USA
James V. Cordova
Affiliation:
Clark University, Psychology Department, Worcester, Massachusetts, USA
*
ADDRESS FOR CORRESPONDENCE: Tatiana D. Gray, Clark University, Psychology Department, 950 Main Street, Worcester, MA 01610, USA. Email: [email protected]
Get access

Abstract

This study employed a novel methodological design to explore how couples transition out of a disagreement that they do not have time to resolve. Thirty college-aged dating couples participated in a 20-minute interaction with their partner where they were required to transition from a conflict conversation to the story of how they met, in a time-limited paradigm. Independent coders coded transition styles and couples completed self-report measures of relationship satisfaction pre, post, and at 6-month follow-up. We identified four transition styles: Mutual Avoidant, Mutual Collaborative, Abrupt/Controlling, and Resign/Withdraw. Couples with a Resign/Withdraw style deteriorated over time compared to couples with the other three styles. Further, couples also varied in terms of transition qualities, including how easily they disengaged and how deeply meaningful the conversation was. Ease of transition was associated with increases in relationship satisfaction at 6 months, whereas depth was associated with decreases in relationship satisfaction both immediately after the interaction and at 6 months. Implications are discussed.

Keywords

datingcouplescommunicationtransitionsconflict
Type
Research Article
Information
Journal of Relationships Research , Volume 6 , 2015 , e11
Copyright
Copyright © The Author(s) 2015 

Access options

Get access to the full version of this content by using one of the access options below. (Log in options will check for institutional or personal access. Content may require purchase if you do not have access.)

References

Afifi, W.A., & Guerrero, L.K. (2000). Motivations underlying topic avoidance in close relationships. In Petronio, S. (Ed.), Balancing the secrets of private disclosures (pp. 165–180). Mahwah, NJ:Erlbaum.Google Scholar
Bertoni, A., & Bodenmann, G. (2010). Satisfied and dissatisfied couples: Positive and negative dimensions, conflict styles, and relationships with family of origin. European Psychologist, 15, 175–184. doi:10.1027/1016-9040/a000015 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Bowles, T. (2005). The pattern of dialogue in compliance seeking situations when conflict is possible: A preliminary study involving adolescents and adults. Australian Educational and Developmental Psychologist, 22, 5–22.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Caughlin, J.P., & Golish, T.D. (2002). An analysis of the association between topic avoidance and dissatisfaction: Comparing perceptual and interpersonal explanations. Communication Monographs, 69, 275–295. doi: 10.1080/03637750216546 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Caughlin, J.P., & Huston, T.L. (2002). A contextual analysis of the associate between demand/withdraw and marital satisfaction. Personal Relationships, 9, 95–119. doi:10.1111/1475-6811.00007 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Christensen, A., Eldridge, K., Catta-Preta, A.B., Lim, V.R., & Santagata, R. (2006). Cross-cultural consistency of the Demand/Withdraw interaction pattern in couples. Journal of Marriage and Family, 68, 1029–1044.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Christensen, A., & Shenk, J.L. (1991). Communication, conflict, and psychological distance in nondistressed, clinic, and divorcing couples. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 59, 458–463. doi:10.1037/0022-006X.59.3.458 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Cummings, E.M., & Davies, P. (1994). Children and marital conflict: The impact of family dispute and resolution. New York: Guilford.Google Scholar
Fincham, F.D., & Beach, S.R.H. (1999). Marriage in the new millennium: Is there a place for social cognition in marital research? Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 16, 685–704. doi:10.1177/0265407599166002 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Funk, J.L., & Rogge, R.D. (2007). Testing the ruler with item response theory: Increasing precision of measurement for relationship satisfaction with the couples satisfaction index. Journal of Family Psychology, 21, 572–583. doi:10.1037/0893-3200.21.4.572 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Golish, T.D. (2000). Is openness always better?: Exploring the associations among topic avoidance, satisfaction, and parenting styles of stepparents. Communication Quarterly, 48, 137–158. doi:10.1080/01463370009385587 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Gottman, J.M. (1993). The roles of conflict engagement, escalation, and avoidance in marital interaction: A longitudinal view of five types of couples. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 61, 6–15. doi:10.1037/0022-006X.61.1.6 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Gottman, J.M. (1994). What predicts divorce? The relationship between marital processes and marital outcomes. Hillsdale, NJ. Lawrence Erlbaum Associates.Google Scholar
Gottman, J.M., & Krokoff, L.J. (1989). The relationship between marital interaction and marital satisfaction: A longitudinal view. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 57, 47–52. doi:10.1037/0022-006X.57.1.47 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Gottman, J.M., & Silver, N. (1999). The seven principles for making marriage work. New York: Crown Publishers.Google Scholar
Hayes, A., & Krippendorf, K. (2007) Answering the call for a standard reliability measure for coding data. Communication Methods and Measures, 1, 77–89.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Heavey, C.L., Christensen, A., & Malamuth, N.M. (1995). The longitudinal impact of demand and withdrawal during marital conflict. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 63, 797–801. doi:10.1037/0022-006X.63.5.797 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Impett, E.A., Gordon, A.M., Kogan, A., Oveis, C., Gable, S.L., & Keltner, D. (2010). Moving toward more perfect unions: Daily and long-term consequences of approach and avoidance goals in romantic relationships. Journal of Personality And Social Psychology, 99, 948–963. doi:1-.1037/a0020271 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Johnson, K.L., & Roloff, M.E. (2000) Correlates of the perceived resolvability and relational consequences of serial arguing in dating relationships: Argumentative features and the use of coping strategies. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 17, 676–686. doi:10.1177/0265407500174011 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Karney, B.R., & Bradbury, T.N. (1995). The longitudinal course of marital quality and stability: A review of theory, methods, and research. Psychological Bulletin, 118, 3–34. doi:10.1037/0033-2909.118.1.3 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Kiecolt-Glaser, J.K., Fisher, L.D., Ogrocki, P., Stout, J.C., Speicher, C.E., & Glaser, R. (1987). Marital quality, marital disruption, and immune function. Psychosomatic Medicine, 49, 13–34. doi:10.1097/00006842-198701000-00002 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Knobloch, L.K., & Carpenter-Theune, K.E. (2004). Topic avoidance in developing romantic relationships: Associations with intimacy and relational uncertainty. Communication Research, 31, 173–205. doi:10.1177/0093650203261516 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Levine, M., & Ensom, M.H. (2001). Post hoc power analysis: An idea whose time has passed? Pharmacotherapy: The Journal of Human Pharmacology and Drug Therapy, 21, 405–409.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Malarkey, W.B., Kiecolt-Glaser, J.K., Pearl, D., & Glaser, R. (1994) Hostile behavior during marital conflict alters pituitary and adrenal hormones. Psychosomatic Medicine, 56, 41–51. doi:10.1097/00006842-199401000-00006 CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Margolin, G., John, R.S., & Gleberman, L. (1989). Affective responses to conflictual discussions in violent and non-violent couples. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 56, 24–33. doi:10.1037/0022-006X.56.1.24 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Markman, H.J., Rhoades, G.K., Stanley, S.M., Ragan, E.P., & Whitton, S.W. (2010). The premarital communication roots of marital distress and divorce: The first five years of marriage. Journal of Family Psychology, 24, 289–298. doi:10.1037/a0019481.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Norton, R. (1983). Measuring marital quality: A critical look at the dependent variable. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 45, 141–151. doi:10.2307/351302 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Roloff, M.E., & Ifert, D.E. (2000). Conflict management through avoidance: Withholding complaints, suppressing arguments, and declaring topics taboo. In Petronio, S. (Ed.), Balancing the secrets of private disclosures (pp. 151–179). Mahwah, NJ: Erlbaum.Google Scholar
Shulman, S., Tuval-Mashiach, R., Levran, E., & Anbar, S. (2006). Conflict resolution patterns and longevity of adolescent romantic couples: A 2 year follow-up study. Journal of Adolescence, 29, 575–588. doi:10.1016/j.adolescence.2005.08.018.CrossRefGoogle ScholarPubMed
Vuchinich, S. (1986). On attenuations in verbal family conflict. Social Psychology Quarterly, 49, 281–293. doi:10.2307/2786767 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Vuchinich, S. (1987). Starting and stopping spontaneous family conflicts. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 49, 591–601. doi:10.2307/352204 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Vuchinich, S., Emery, R.E., & Cassidy, J. (1988). Family members ad third parties in dyadic family conflict: Strategies, alliances, and outcomes. Child Development, 59, 1293–1302. doi:10.2307/1130492 CrossRefGoogle Scholar
Weiss, R.L., & Heyman, R.E. (1997). Couple interaction. In Halford, W.K. & Markman, H.J. (Eds.), Clinical handbook of marriage and couples intervention (pp. 13–41). New York: Wiley.Google Scholar