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Published online by Cambridge University Press: 15 May 2015
Studies concerned with modernity, mission Christianity, and sexuality generally address how western, Christian gender ideologies have affected women or how they have affected modernization. This article approaches the nexus of modernity, Christianity, and sexuality from a different angle. One of the notable consequences of modernization was that young people in industrializing nations began demanding the right to choose their own spouse and marry for love. Several scholars have noted the connection between modernization and spouse self-selection, but none have explored the relationship between Christianity's endorsement of spouse self-selection and its global appeal during the mid-twentieth century. This article examines a collection of letters written by young Africans to missionary Walter Trobisch after reading his popular 1962 book, I Loved a Girl. These letters suggest that Christianity's endorsement of spouse self-selection and marrying for love gave it a kind of modern appeal for young people who were eagerly adopting the modern values of individualism and self-fulfillment. The practice of prayer provided relief to young people who were struggling to navigate the unfamiliar realm of dating in the modern world.
1 Trobisch, The Complete Works of Walter Trobisch (Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity, 1987)Google Scholar, 31.
2 Ibid.
3 Ibid., 33.
4 Ibid.
5 Bovet, Theodor, Love, Skill and Mystery: A Handbook to Marriage (New York: Doubleday & Company, 1958)Google Scholar, xiii.
6 Trobisch, The Complete Works, 57.
7 Between 1962 and 1964, thirty thousand copies of the book were sold in French Cameroon alone (E. Suh to Walter Trobisch, June 25, 1964, box 15, folder S, Walter Trobisch Collection, Evangelical Lutheran Church in America Archives, Elk Grove Village, Ill. [hereafter WTC-ELCAA]). By 1965, both the English and French editions were “in their fourth printing” (List of all the editions of J'ai Aimé Une Fille either published or in progress, box 12, “Heidelberg” folder, WTC-ELCAA). Translations existed or were in progress for about thirty African languages (David Trobisch has copies of most of these editions and translations at his home in Springfield, Miss. It is also still possible to find copies of them in various libraries throughout the world). By 1969, sixteen printings of the text had been made for English-speaking Africans (James Sutton to Walter Trobisch, December 5, 1969, Ingrid Trobisch Papers, David Trobisch Residence, Springfield, Miss.). The French edition also went through several printings (WorldCat, accessed August 6, 2012, lists four printings from Karl Bäuerle in Karlsruhe, Germany, four from Editions Trobisch, one from Ed. Labor et fides in Genève, and one from Opération mobilisation France). For Trobisch's claim that the tragic ending of I Loved a Girl contributed to its popularity, see Walter Trobisch to Edward Sammis, April 7, 1964, Ingrid Trobisch Papers, David Trobisch Residence, Springfield, Miss.
8 Trobisch, Walter, I Love a Young Man (London: United Society for Christian Literature, 1964).Google Scholar
9 Walter Trobisch to John Beunde, April 14, 1964, box 14, WTC-ELCAA.
10 As the letters became more numerous, Trobisch hired people to help him answer them. The Trobisches kept the letters they had received and carbon copies of the letters they wrote in response. See Anneke Stasson, “Love, Sex, and Marriage in the Global Mission of Walter and Ingrid Trobisch” (PhD thesis, Boston University, 2013), 130–134.
11 Ingrid Trobisch to Mrs. Johnson, August 25, 1971, box 19, WTC-ELCAA. Some people carried on a correspondence with Trobisch over a series of months or years. Others simply wrote him a single letter. This article focuses on letters from people who carried on a lengthy correspondence with Trobisch.
12 This estimate comes from Joel Thoreson, Archivist at the ELCAA, email to author, May 12, 2014.
13 Lutz, Jessie G., “Women's Education and Social Mobility,” in Pioneer Chinese Christian Women: Gender, Christianity, and Social Mobility, ed. Lutz, Jessie G. (Bethlehem, Penn.: Lehigh University, 2010)Google Scholar, 397, 410, 412; Ryan Dunch, “‘Mothers to Our Country': Conversion, Education, and Ideology among Chinese Protestant Women, 1870–1930,” in ibid., 336, 338–339.
14 Lutz, “Women's Education and Social Mobility,” 411.
15 Ibid., 412; Dunch, “Mothers to Our Country” 327.
16 Jessie G. Lutz, “Beyond Missions: Christianity as a Chinese Religion in a Changing China,” in Pioneer Chinese Christian Women, 423.
17 Moena, Sylvia N., “Family Life in Soweto, Gauteng, South Africa,” in African Families at the Turn of the 21st Century, eds. Oheneba-Sakyi, Yaw and Takyi, Baffour K. (Westport, Conn.: Praeger, 2006)Google Scholar, 255.
18 Comaroff, Jean and Comaroff, John, Of Revelation and Revolution: Christianity, Colonialism, and Consciousness in South Africa (Chicago: University of Chicago, 1991)CrossRefGoogle Scholar, 313.
19 Labode, Modupe, “From Heathen Kraal to Christian Home: Anglican Mission Education and African Christian Girls, 1850–1900,” in Women and Missions: Past and Present, eds. Bowie, Fiona, Kirkwood, Deborah, and Ardener, Shirley (Providence, R.I.: Berg, 1993)Google Scholar, 129, 132; Tabitha Kanogo, “Mission Impact on Women in Colonial Kenya,” in ibid.
20 Fiona Bowie, “The Elusive Christian Family: Missionary Attempts to Define Women's Roles, Case Studies from Cameroon,” in ibid., 146.
21 For the connection between modernization and spouse self-selection, see footnote 129.
22 Hunt, Nancy Rose, “Introduction,” in Gendered Colonialisms in African History, eds. Hunt, Nancy Rose, Liu, Tessie P., and Quataert, Jean (Malden, Mass.: Blackwell, 1997)Google Scholar, 4.
23 Nancy Rose Hunt, “Introduction,” 9.
24 Muzorewa, Gwinyai H., The Origins and Development of African Theology (Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis Books, 1985)Google Scholar, 66.
25 A survey of the material, in fact, found only one person who expressed any kind of criticism of Trobisch's view of love, sex, and marriage. The letter came from S. Iyoku, a twenty-five-year-old preacher and Bible translator in Nigeria. Interestingly, Iyoku's criticism was that Trobisch was too lenient on African traditions like polygamy (S. Iyoku to Walter Trobisch, January 2, 1972, WTC-ELCA). In a later letter Iyoku also told Trobisch that his books had neglected to mention how important it was for a couple to be financially stable prior to marriage (S. Iyoku to Walter Trobisch, November 8, 1973, WTC-ELCA).
26 Stone, Lawrence, The Family, Sex, and Marriage in England 1500–1800 (New York: Harper Colophon, 1977).Google Scholar
27 Harries, Lyndon, “Christian Marriage in African Society,” in Survey of African Marriage and Family Life, ed. Phillips, Arthur (New York: Oxford University, 1953)Google Scholar, 344.
28 Ibid, 360.
29 Erlank, Natasha, “Jane and John Philip: Partnership, Usefulness & Sexuality in the Service of God” in The London Missionary Society in Southern Africa, 1799–1999, ed. de Gruchy, John (Athens: Ohio University, 2000)Google Scholar, 84.
30 Anna Hinderer said of her marriage to David: “We are one in heart, and meet in spirit, when absent in the body.” François Coillard said of his marriage to Christina: “We were only one in everything.” Hinderer, Anna, Seventeen Years in the Yoruba Country: Memorials of Anna Hinderer, Wife of the Rev. David Hinderer, C.M.S. Missionary in Western Africa, 4th ed. (London: The Religious Tract Society, 1877)Google Scholar, 231; Mackintosh, C. W., Coillard of the Zambesi: The Lives of François and Christina Coillard, of the Paris Missionary Society, in South and Central Africa (1858–1904) (New York: The American Tract Society, 1907)Google Scholar, 456.
31 Robert, Dana L., American Women in Mission: A Social History of Their Thought and Practice (Macon, Ga: Mercer University, 1996), 65–75Google Scholar, Robert, Dana L., “The ‘Christian Home' as a Cornerstone of Anglo-American Missionary Thought and Practice,” in Converting Colonialism: Visions and Realities in Mission History, 1706–1914, ed. Robert, Dana L. (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Eerdmans, 2008), 143–144.Google Scholar
32 Anderson, Rufus, “Introductory Essay on the Marriage of Missionaries,” in Ellis, William, Memoir of Mrs. Mary Mercy Ellis, Wife of Rev. William Ellis, Missionary to the South Seas (Boston, Mass.: Crocker & Brewster, 1836)Google Scholar, xi.
33 Gaitskell, Deborah, “Housewives, Maids or Mothers: Some Contradictions of Domesticity for Christian Women in Johannesburg, 1903–39,” The Journal of African History 24, no. 2 (June 1983): 242.CrossRefGoogle Scholar
34 Hansen, Karen Tranberg “Introduction: Domesticity in Africa,” in African Encounters with Domesticity, ed. Hansen, Karen Tranberg (New Brunswick, N.J.: Rutgers University, 1992)CrossRefGoogle Scholar, 5.
35 Nancy Rose Hunt, “Colonial Fairy Tales and the Knife and Fork Doctrine in the Heart of Africa” in ibid., 148.
36 Erlank, Natasha, “‘Civilising the African’: the Scottish mission to the Xhosa, 1821–1864,” in Christian Missions and the Enlightenment, ed. Stanley, Brian (London: Curzon, 2001)Google Scholar, 150.
37 Harries, “Christian Marriage in African Society,” 365.
38 Bosch, David, Transforming Mission: Paradigm Shifts in Theology of Mission (Maryknoll, N.Y.: Orbis, 2004), 291–298.Google Scholar
39 Hastings, Adrian, Christian Marriage in Africa (London: SPCK, 1973)Google Scholar, 27.
40 Ibid., 30.
41 Arthur Phillips, “An Introductory Essay,” in Survey of African Marriage, xiv, xv, xvii.
42 Erlank, Natasha, “Strange Bedfellows: The International Missionary Council, the International African Institute, and Research into African Marriage and Family,” in The Spiritual in the Secular: Missionaries and Knowledge About Africa, eds. Harries, Patrick and Maxwell, David (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Eerdmans, 2012)Google Scholar, 272.
43 Ibid., 275. They invited Rev. James W. Welch to deliver a paper on this topic at one of their meetings, a paper which he later published. See Welch, James W., “Can Christian Marriage in Africa Be African?,” International Review of Missions 22 (1933).CrossRefGoogle Scholar
44 Dougall, James W. C., ed., Christianity and the Sex-Education of the African (London: Society for Promoting Christian Knowledge, 1937), 11–13.Google Scholar
45 Ibid.
46 Pauw, B.A., The Second Generation: A Study of the Family Among Urbanized Bantu in East London (New York: Oxford University, 1963)Google Scholar, 137.
47 Dougall, Christianity and the Sex-Education of the African, 20–21.
48 Hastings, Christian Marriage in Africa, 20.
49 Ibid., 108.
50 All-Africa Seminar on the Christian Home and Family Life, The All-Africa Seminar on the Christian Home and Family Life (Kitwe, Northern Rhodesia: Geneva, 1963)Google Scholar, 56.
51 Trobisch, The Complete Works, 61.
52 Genesis 2:24, King James Version.
53 Trobisch, The Complete Works, 383.
54 Ibid., 511.
55 Dougall, Christianity and the Sex-Education of the African, 100–101, 122; Hastings, Christian Marriage in Africa, 64.
56 Hastings believed that the lack of marriage guidance in Africa was “the most obvious gap in the Church's work.” He called Trobisch “one of the most experienced Lutheran missionaries working in Africa” and appreciated Trobisch's pioneering work as a marriage counselor. Hastings, Christian Marriage in Africa, 107.
57 In the original French: “Suis-je donc à vendre, pour que vous vous croyiez obligés de me donner au plus offrant? Ne puis-je donc pas être consultée pour un marriage qui me concerne?” Guillaume Oyono Mbia, Trois Prétendants . . . Un Mari (Yaoundé: Editions CLE, 1964), 17–18.Google Scholar
58 Certainly the transition was not quite that stark. As Hastings notes, “It is not true to say that young people never had any choice as to whom they were to marry . . . But it is true that marriage was seen more in terms of the group than of the nuclear family; that in many cases the choice of the partner was made largely—in some cases wholly—by parents or other senior relations.” Hastings, Christian Marriage in Africa, 29.
59 Goode, World Revolution and Family Patterns (New York: The Free Press, 1963)Google Scholar, 171.
60 Chuks J. Mba and Martin W. Bangha, “Reflections on the Changing Family System in Cameroon,” in African Families, 187.
61 Levin, Ruth, “Marriage in Langa Native Location,” Communications from the School of African Studies (Cape Town: University of Cape Town, 1947)Google Scholar, 12; Lawrence, J.C.D., The Iteso (New York: Oxford University, 1957)Google Scholar, 94; Meattie, J.H.M., “Nyoro Marriage and Affinity,” Africa 28 (1958): 5Google Scholar; Banton, Michael, West African City: A Study of Tribal Life in Freetown (New York: Oxford University, 1957)Google Scholar, 208; John S. Mbiti, Love and Marriage in Africa, 225–226.
62 Little, Kenneth, “Attitudes Towards Marriage and the Family among Educated Young Sierra Leoneans,” in The New Elites of Tropical Africa, ed. Lloyd, P.C. (New York: Oxford University, 1966)Google Scholar, 149.
63 Lloyd, P. C., Africa in Social Change (Harmondsworth: Penguin, 1967)Google Scholar, 30.
64 Marie André du Sacré Cœur, The House Stands Firm: Family Life in West Africa (Milwaukee, Wisc.: Bruce, 1962)Google Scholar, 228.
65 Ibid., 231.
66 Dougall, Christianity and the Sex-Education of the African, 12–13; Trobisch, I Loved a Girl; Trobisch, Walter, Love Is a Feeling to Be Learned (Kehl/Rhein: Editions Trobisch, 1971)Google Scholar; Hastings, Christian Marriage in Africa, 38; Mbiti, John, Love and Marriage in Africa (London: Longman, 1973), 33, 66–67Google Scholar, 72–74.
67 In traditional Cameroonian society, among the Akan of Ghana, and among the Nupe of West Africa all premarital sex was frowned upon (Mba, “Reflections on the Changing Family System in Cameroon,” 186; Ayisi, Eric O., An Introduction to the Study of Africa Culture, 2nd ed. [London: Heinemann, 1979]Google Scholar, 6; Lucy Mair, “African Marriage and Social Change” in Survey of African Marriage, 11, 118). Among the Xhosa of South Africa, the Gikuyu of Kenya, the Pondo, Venda and Zulu of Southern Africa, and the Hausa of West Africa some premarital sexual activity was allowed, but young people were to avoid becoming pregnant (Pauw, The Second Generation, 121; Kenyatta, Jomo, Facing Mount Kenya [New York: Vintage Books, 1965]Google Scholar, 149; Mair, “African Marriage and Social Change,” 11–12, 118). In some African societies—for example among the Ganda, Luhya, Hehe, Kipsigis, Birwana, Sumbwa, and Gikuyu of East Africa—female virginity upon marriage was praised, even though premarital sex was allowed (Mair, “African Marriage and Social Change,” 50). It should also be mentioned that some African societies—for example, the Junam of East Africa and the Korongo and Mesakin of West Africa—had no problem with premarital sex (Mair, “African Marriage and Social Change,” 49, 118).
68 Trobisch, The Complete Works, 36–37.
69 C. Tanmi to Walter Trobisch, June 1965, box 15, folder T, WTC-ELCAA.
70 Ibid.
71 Jean Banyolak, “Africa Needs Marriage Counsellors,” All Africa Conference of Churches Bulletin (February 1965): 67.
72 T. Bogale to Walter Trobisch, April 1, 1967, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
73 Ibid.
74 J. Ngbede Elijah to Walter Trobisch, August 12, 1975, box 14, folder E, WTC-ELCAA.
75 N. Tangwan to Ingrid Trobisch, February 23, 1966, box 15, folder T, WTC-ELCAA.
76 F. Tekele to Walter Trobisch, November 17, 1966, box 15, folder T, WTC-ELCAA.
77 A. Suh to Walter Trobisch, April 17, 1968, box 15, folder S, WTC-ELCAA.
78 Walter Trobisch to A. Suh, May 1, 1968, box 15, folder S, WTC-ELCAA.
79 Ibid.
80 When she next wrote, she said, “I was really very happy with the reply of your letter.” A. Suh to Walter Trobisch, August 1, 1968, box 15, folder S, WTC-ELCAA.
81 W. Kyereh to Walter Trobisch, February 5, 1974, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
82 Ibid.
83 M. Bekele to Walter Trobisch, October 26, 1967, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
84 Ibid.
85 L. H. Chikoya to Walter Trobisch, October 15, 1973, box 14, folder C, WTC-ELCAA.
86 W. Banutalira to Walter Trobisch, n.d., box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
87 Walter Trobisch to W. Banutalira, April 4, 1968, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
88 W. Banutalira to Walter Trobisch, June 8, 1970, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
89 Trobisch, The Complete Works, 50–52.
90 S. Iyoku to Walter Trobisch, November 8, 1973, box 14, folder I, WTC-ELCAA.
91 Ibid.
92 Walter Trobisch to S. Iyoku, December 13, 1973, box 14, folder I, WTC-ELCAA.
93 T. Fosu to Walter Trobisch, June 6, 1974, box 14, folder F, WTC-ELCAA.
94 M. Chulu to Walter Trobisch, April 17, 1969, box 14, folder C, WTC-ELCAA.
95 M. Bekele to Walter Trobisch, October 26, 1967, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA. Mudido from Uganda had the same question. See E. Mudido to Ingrid Trobisch, March 8, 1966, box 15, folder M.
96 M. Bekele to Walter Trobisch, March 29, 1968, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
97 Walter Trobisch to M. Bekele, April 21, 1968, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
98 J. Kizza to Walter Trobisch, n.d., box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
99 Walter Trobisch to J. Kizza, December 15, 1969, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
100 J. Kizza to Walter Trobisch, January 19, 1970, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
101 J. Kinyanjui to Walter Trobisch, January 18, 1978, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
102 Walter Trobisch to J. Kinyanjui, March 3, 1978, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
103 J. Kinyanjui to Walter Trobisch, January 30, 1979, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
104 Walter Trobisch to J. Kinyanjui, May 4, 1979, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
105 G. Mashaba to Ingrid Trobisch, October 17, 1966, box 15, folder M, WTC-ELCAA.
106 Walter Trobisch to G. Mashaba, July 6, 1967, box 15, folder M, WTC-ELCAA.
107 Ibid.
108 Y. Beiene to Walter Trobisch, September 30, 1971, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
109 Ibid.
110 Walter Trobisch to Y. Beiene, November 24, 1971, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
111 Y. Beiene to Walter Trobisch, December 1, 1971, box 14, folder B, WTC-ELCAA.
112 A. Wibaba to Ingrid Trobisch, n.d., box 15, folder W, WTC-ELCAA.
113 Walter Trobisch to A. Wibaba, November 14, 1968, box 15, folder W, WTC-ELCAA.
114 She wrote, “If ever God wants me to marry I would like a man who will be interested to work with me in my church because my church counts a lot on me.” Wibaba to Trobisch, n.d., box 15, folder W, WTC-ELCAA.
115 P. Kagotho to Walter Trobisch, May 12, 1973 and January 5, 1974, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
116 Walter Trobisch to P. Kagotho, January 28, 1974, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
117 P. Kagotho to Walter Trobisch, April 18, 1975, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
118 R. Klu to Walter Trobisch, April 29, 1976, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
119 Walter Trobisch to R. Klu, June 29, 1976, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA
120 R. Klu to Walter Trobisch, October 29, 1976, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
121 R. Klu to Walter Trobisch, February 24, 1977, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
122 R. Klu to Walter Trobisch, June 13, 1977, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
123 Walter Trobisch to R. Klu, June 13, 1977 and R. Klu to Walter Trobisch, December 14, 1978, box 14, folder K, WTC-ELCAA.
124 Gaitskell, “Housewives, Maids or Mothers,” 255.
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133 The Walter Trobisch archival materials offer further support for this claim. Between 1962 and 1979, Trobisch's I Loved a Girl was translated into some seventy languages spanning six continents. Trobisch received letters from readers around the globe. It has not been possible for this article to incorporate letters from regions outside of Africa, but such work would certainly help to substantiate the global claim of this article. For a translation history of I Loved a Girl, see Stasson, “Love, Sex, and Marriage,” 116–130.