Am I Really a Woman?: A Question About Female Identity in Etty Hillesum

Summary

Abstract

The configuration of human identity is not an isolated process of mystical experience. That is why, in the mystical itinerary of Etty Hillesum, her female being is intimately linked with an identity that is being constituted in parallel to her inner searches. Femininity, as a path of freedom and realization of being a woman, has a particular perspective from Etty Hillesum.

Keywords: identity, femininity, female identity, mysticism, liberation, love, Simone de Beauvoir, emancipation

The question, who am I? with all its possible answers, serves as an existential engine in the inner life processes of many human beings who consider themselves, or are considered, mystical. In the vital itinerary narrated in her diaries, Etty Hillesum embarked on a path of self-discovery independent of any particular religious belief. It is important to bear in mind that the mystical experience is often conceived of as the affirmation of an identity that revolves around the doctrinal assumptions of a particular religion. For Hillesum, however, the mystical experience was a path of self-affirmation on a simple human scale. Therefore, in Hillesum we find an identity that broke with all sorts of stereotypes of her time and that was marked by the concept of personal liberation. Considering these things, Le deuxième sexe, by Simone de Beauvoir is relevant. The French philosopher exposes the subject of feminine identity that is germane to Etty Hillesum as it relates to the same cultural context. First, I will establish that the fundamental presupposition of the subjective constitution in Hillesum's writings is the existence of the other or otherness. Starting by looking at the first description that Etty Hillesum wrote of herself, I will address the process of emancipation that led Hillesum to an experience of inner liberation. Finally, I will lay out Hillesum's mystical experience as a process of inner liberation and affirmation of her womanhood.

The Role of the Other in the Configuration of Etty Hillesum's Identity

The foundation of authenticity for determining what is human is the relationship. To think of ourselves as existing, requires conceiving of ourselves as not being the other. The constitution of identity has as its starting point the relationship with the other: I am not me without you. In the mystical experience, the subjectivity of the mystic manifests itself as openness and availability towards the other.