Four - From Conflict to Collaboration

Summary

One of the most intriguing aspects of the experience of lockdown is coming face to face with ourselves and those we live most closely with. For many, navigating daily relationships at home and work is an exercise in dodging difficult conversations. When there is no way out – physically or psychologically – we are left confronting our own internal contradictions as well as butting up against the competing interests of others.

This chapter explores what impact a greater awareness and understanding of those small, everyday conflicts – within ourselves as much as with others – could have on our collective future. It reframes conflict as inevitable, normal and not necessarily destructive, an integral part of all human interaction and one that serves a useful purpose, directing our attention to issues that need addressing and reminding us that our interests and worldviews are not necessarily those of others. This understanding leads to a flexibility in thought and imagination, which is a key skill for navigating our relationships at home and at work, as well as for collaborative working in any arena.

Conflict skills are also essential for effective stewarding of commons at any scale, the concept of commons here referring to shared resources – from the quality of silence on your street during lockdown to public health or climate change impacts. What COVID-19 and lockdown has made more evident is what we take for granted: when crisis happens, we recognize the layers of hidden relationships and shared world that we all inhabit. Recognizing these hidden relationships can help us to better steward the commons.

In this context, we draw on a conversation between Paul Kahawatte (P), Hen Wilkinson (H) and Emilia Melville (E) exploring the potential for the lockdown to transform our experiences of conflict in a positive way. We know that for many people lockdown is hard and dangerous, and that conflict in domestic violence situations may be deadly. However, crisis calls for work of the imagination, and so this chapter aims to leave you with some clues and excitement about how we might transform our experiences of conflict and what this might mean for the world after COVID-19.