Book contents
- Frontmatter
- Dedication
- Contents
- Death Begins with the Loss of Our Cities…
- Are You Going to Be a Killer?
- An Idea Whose Time Has Come
- Your Decision
- Dogs Smelling Blood on a Hunt
- The Meaning of This Empire for Us
- Confronting Death
- The Ancient Wound
- The Essence of the State
- Becoming the Hunted
- Like Two Wistful Flowers
- The World's Greatest Mystery
- The Love That Will Never Fade
- What Does a Single Individual Matter?
- A Game of Revenge
- The Motherland Is Lost
- The Only Thing Keeping Me Alive
- No Intention of Surrendering
- A Man's Word Is His Honour
- An Inappropriate Sense of Compassion
- A Token of a Conversation
- I Am Not the One to Decide
- Miracles
- The Ability to Forgive Ourselves
- Losing One's Humanity
- No Choice But to Fight
- Give Me an Honourable Death
- The Walking Dead
- Save Yourself, Soldier
- Wishing for Help from the Dead
- Resign, Your Excellency!
- A False Sense of Security
- The True Power in the Land
- Betrothed to Life, Married to Death
- When the Wolf Dies in the Forest
- This Is Not Ankara
- Vultures Circling Over an Old Man
- Ignoble Alliances
- A Betrayal of Their Own History
- Fighting for a Lost Cause
- Evil Stalks This Land
- A Malevolent Rain
- A Fragmented Homeland, a Disintegrating World
- Turning Us All into Killers
- When I Began Losing My Country
- Farewell, My Beautiful Homeland
- Glossary
An Idea Whose Time Has Come
- Frontmatter
- Dedication
- Contents
- Death Begins with the Loss of Our Cities…
- Are You Going to Be a Killer?
- An Idea Whose Time Has Come
- Your Decision
- Dogs Smelling Blood on a Hunt
- The Meaning of This Empire for Us
- Confronting Death
- The Ancient Wound
- The Essence of the State
- Becoming the Hunted
- Like Two Wistful Flowers
- The World's Greatest Mystery
- The Love That Will Never Fade
- What Does a Single Individual Matter?
- A Game of Revenge
- The Motherland Is Lost
- The Only Thing Keeping Me Alive
- No Intention of Surrendering
- A Man's Word Is His Honour
- An Inappropriate Sense of Compassion
- A Token of a Conversation
- I Am Not the One to Decide
- Miracles
- The Ability to Forgive Ourselves
- Losing One's Humanity
- No Choice But to Fight
- Give Me an Honourable Death
- The Walking Dead
- Save Yourself, Soldier
- Wishing for Help from the Dead
- Resign, Your Excellency!
- A False Sense of Security
- The True Power in the Land
- Betrothed to Life, Married to Death
- When the Wolf Dies in the Forest
- This Is Not Ankara
- Vultures Circling Over an Old Man
- Ignoble Alliances
- A Betrayal of Their Own History
- Fighting for a Lost Cause
- Evil Stalks This Land
- A Malevolent Rain
- A Fragmented Homeland, a Disintegrating World
- Turning Us All into Killers
- When I Began Losing My Country
- Farewell, My Beautiful Homeland
- Glossary
Summary
Dear Ester (Late Afternoon, Day 1)
‘The important thing’, my late father used to say, ‘is to conquer your fear. If you do not, that vile emotion will bring you to your knees’. The incident that made me remember my father saying that occurred this afternoon. I had sat down at the desk to continue writing to you when I heard some noises just outside my door. I leapt up and listened. Something was happening in the hall… Screams and shouts and a general hullabaloo. At first, I thought it was the police, that the time had come for them to slap the handcuffs on me and drag me away. And how quickly they had come too! But why was I surprised? I was already expecting them and now here they were. Finally. They had arrived. I steeled myself and opened the door, expecting to see a mass of stern, hardened police faces but what I saw instead was a hotel maid staring at me in wide-eyed fright.
‘A fire!’ she shouted. ‘A fire has broken out, sir! Please, let's go downstairs!’
I suddenly began laughing. The poor woman did not know what was going on as she watched me double over with laughter. I eventually managed to pull myself together and we made our way down to the lobby. It was pandemonium downstairs, with ladies screaming and fainting everywhere… Thankfully, it was not a serious fire. The flames had not spread and once the fire had been put out, we were able to return to our rooms.
I did not return to my writing immediately. Hanging a few hand widths above the cupboard on the wall by my bed is a photograph in a silver frame. I have seen it many times but now, as I write to you, its significance dawns on me. It is a photograph of the Rue des Petit Champs, the street on which the Pera Palace can be found, taken on the 24th of July 1908. The little square is teeming with people and at the foot of the photo, in French, is the following: A march by military cadets on the 24 July 1908 celebrating the declaration of the new constitution.
- Type
- Chapter
- Information
- Farewell, My Beautiful Homeland , pp. 11 - 18Publisher: Anthem PressPrint publication year: 2019