Letter CLXIV

Summary

From the same: Describing her fluttering Pretender.

Honoured Madam,

I now give you some Account of the Captain. He is a handsome Person of a Man, of a good Family: Heir to a good Estate: Dresses well, sings well, dances well—So much for his good Qualities. As for his others; he is insufferably vain; talkative; is always laughing, especially at what he says himself; and, sometimes, at the Conceit of what he is going to say, before he speaks: He has such an undaunted Assurance, that there is no such thing as putting him out of Countenance. One Instance I’ll give you—He is always admiring himself in the Glass; insomuch that while he is in the Room, I cannot peep into one without staring him in the Face; and one Day rallying him on this, I ask’d him how the Glasses were fixed in a Camp? He reply’d, without Hesitation, O Madam! the Care our Generals take to pitch our Tents by the Banks of some transparent Stream, serves very well for that Purpose. And then he laugh’d most egregiously for five or six Minutes together.

You may believe, Madam, from what I have said, that I give no great Encouragement to his Visits. Yet is there no such thing as getting rid of him; for by all his Conduct, I plainly see, he has swallow’d the ridiculous Opinion, that the more averse a Woman appears to a Man's Addresses, the more Ground he has to expect Success; and he seems so assured of winning me, that I begin to be apprehensive, every time he puts his Hand in his Pocket, that he will pull out a Licence and a Ring—If I admit him into my Company, I know not how to get rid of him. If I cause myself to be deny’d, he plants himself directly against my Window, that the whole Neighbourhood may know his Business: Thus, with or without my Consent, he will be either thought my reigning Admirer, or he will, Don Quixote like, have me for his Dulcinea, in spite of my Teeth.